Postpartum Truths No One Told Me (But I'm Telling You)
by Marsha Stephanson
Let’s be real, nothing, I mean nothing, can fully prepare you for postpartum life. There are the things you think you know (you’ll be tired, your body will change, the baby will cry), and then there are the things no one warns you about. So I’m here to tell you the truths I wish someone had told me, in all their messy, hilarious, humbling glory.
1. You will smell like breastmilk and sweat. Constantly.
And no, you won’t always have time to shower. But on the days you do, when the stars align and you actually get 10 minutes alone with hot water and a clean towel? Game changer. Smelling fresh, even for a little while, can reset your whole mood.
2. Your shoe size might never be the same.
I thought the swelling would go down quickly. Spoiler alert: It didn’t. It took forever before I could squeeze back into my favorite heels. And honestly, even when I could, I questioned why I ever loved them in the first place. (Give me supportive sneakers, please!)
3. Loud sleeper alert: your baby.
Why do newborns sound like mini freight trains when they sleep? Snorts, grunts, tiny growls… I spent weeks wondering if something was wrong before realizing: nope, that’s just what babies do. Ironically, you finally get them to sleep—and then you can’t sleep because you’re listening to every little noise.
4. Sleep deprivation = postpartum delirium.
One time, I packed this beautiful baby shower gift basket and proudly headed to the event. When I arrived at the address, I thought it was strange that there were no balloons outside, no line of cars, nothing that screamed "baby shower." I called my friend to ask if the location had changed, and she casually said, "Girl, it’s next weekend." I was so sleep-deprived (running on maybe three hours of sleep) from being up with my baby that I completely got the date wrong. Postpartum brain is real.
5. You’ll cry over everything… and nothing.
Hormones are wild. I once cried because I burned my homemade lactation cookies. (Don’t worry, I still ate them. Whatever gets the milk flowing, right? #iykyk) I cried again because the baby looked too peaceful to wake up, but I had to feed her. And don’t even get me started on sad commercials. It’s okay. Let it out. Crying is part of the healing, too.
6. You may not feel bonded right away.
That overwhelming wave of love some moms talk about? It doesn’t always hit instantly. And that’s okay. Bonding can take time. Don’t guilt yourself into believing it means you love your baby any less.
7. The loneliness hits differently.
Even when your house is full of visitors or support, postpartum can feel deeply isolating. You’re healing, navigating a new identity, and often doing it on very little sleep. Reach out, even if it’s just a text. You deserve support, too.
8. Healing isn’t one-size-fits-all.
Physically, emotionally, and mentally, everyone heals at a different pace. Be gentle with yourself. Whether you’re five weeks in or five months in, you're still deserving of care, rest, and grace.
9. You are not the same woman you were before—and that’s not a bad thing.
Motherhood changes you. It reshapes your priorities, your body, and sometimes even your dreams. But it doesn’t erase who you are. It just adds to your story.
Mama, if you’re in it right now, I see you. It’s hard, it’s beautiful, it’s exhausting, and it’s sacred. You deserve nurturing, not just as a mother but as a woman.
If you need a little extra support, check out our Cater to Mom postpartum boxes. Designed by a mom, for moms—to make you feel seen, heard, and held.
